We for me this is how it went down. I grew up in the church im a PK (preacher's kid) and frankly when i got clear i wanted to stay clear. Life can be totally unfair; especially when you get with a woman and you are trying to make that work. I would work, come home, deal with the kids and the wife, find out whats been going on with her at her job (if she's working), and whats to eat. That's pretty much the day in a nutshell. There is no prayer time, bible studying time, or real fellowship with my then wife and or kids. Sprinkle in some video games to chill out and this was my day. now if any ladies read this let me put a disclaimer now lol. I am in no way trying to bash any woman or specific type of woman. I am just explaining my experiences and what I as a male went through in hopes of relating to other men.
Ok so now that that is out of the way I can proceed. I know men in general are not big on discussing their worries or problems because either folk won't understand where we are coming from or we feel we don't need to talk about it. Now I don't get this logic, because normally we will hit up one of our boys "friends" and talk to them all day. The only thing I can think of is that with me I didn't really want to face what God had to say. I wanted to be right even though I knew I was dead wrong. If I read my bible then that means it's going to tell me exactly how I am and frankly I get enough flack from my woman. I mean seriously what man wants to go to church to hear a sermon and then that sermon ends up convicting them to the point where they will just say whats the point all I am going to hear is the same exact mess I get at home?
This was my way of thinking for a long time. I didn't get any real comfort or emotional support so frankly I didn't give any back. Mind you I had a bunch of other issues; anger, hatred, selfishness...etc etc. So needless to say every man I am sure is not going through this, but I am willing to bet that it's to some degree. The reason why I say this is because I was once in anger management and even though it was ordered by the state for me to go it still was a place to open up freely without being judged.
You would be surprised how vulnerable a man will get when he can really open up without feeling less than a man. I mean we got men in there who are hurt because they can't see their kids but they hate their kids mom; just keeping it real ladies. But the point is the counselor was able to get down to "brass tactics" with all the men and it ended up being a great class that I looked forward to every week. Even some women that got to sit in on the class loved it. Which blew my mind. My thing is this men. I get what your saying on a whole bunch of levels. The Lord allowed me to go through a whole bunch not just for my growth but to help other men out. I am very concerned about the state of men in the church.
I know men want to be the providers and the rock and strength of the family they are blessed with. That's all well and good, but when you feel weak were are u gonna turn to? When it feels like everything including your woman is coming at you at machine gun fire pace; where can you go hid and regroup? Men we need to make Christ our foundation and not ourselves. We aint that strong. I hate to break it to you, but alone we are not all that strong. We would like to think we are, but the truth is we got vulnerabilities and we got worries. The only person that understands that and cares is Christ. he already knows what's up so why not get to know Him first.
It took me hitting rock bottom to get to this point, but the Lord spared me. This will not happen for everyone, some will never hear the Lord call out to them and it's sad because their is so much freedom and joy and peace in the Lord that you become more of a man with Him than without Him. Now I did pretty good this time; i didn't quote one scripture, which for me is pretty good lol, but know that I am really trying to get to the bottom of this. I went through the whole prayer of Lord I am only one man in one small city; what can I possibly do that will any bit of a difference? and the scripture that keeps coming to mind is 1 Corinthians 3:7. God grants the increase, the growth. So if i am truly leaving it all in God's hands then that means that I have just got to do and let God handle the rest.
This blog is meant for men and in hopes of encouraging to give Christ and his bride (the church) a try more seriously. Coming on Sunday is great and good practice, but my main desire is for a lifestyle change. I want to see men accept the title of "Man of God" and let that title convict them to the point where they will ask themselves are they really a man of God? and if not how can I be one?
Please feel free to leave any comments (tastefully)
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