The cost is just too much!!

The day has been quite heavy for me.  Not because of what happened to me but what I did to someone else.  I debated even blogging about it, because frankly people always use the excuse your sins are between you and God.  Frankly that is a lie from Satan himself.  The world is explicable and deliberate in stating before you come to me with a sacrifice if there is dissension between you and your brother, leave and reconcile first and then come back to me and present your offering (Matt 5:23-24).  So I take that scripture extremely seriously and try to adhere to it every time.  But what about when you have done something against your brother/sister and you could possibly lose their friendship or trust or even worse your witness?  This is what I want to share on this post  today.  I share this in hopes that it will help someone else not make the same mistakes I have made.  When Jesus asked Peter to feed his sheep, he meant the truth of the gospel and all that it entails.  That even means even presenting yourself as a lesson and example.  As a believer and follower of Christ; the option to do what we want when we want cost us way too much.  It is this cost that I had forgotten about...Listen up

Throughout the majority of my life I have really had only one true friend.  As I got a little older and started making the move to live for Christ I was blessed with several that I have come to love and trust.  Those that I would easily put myself in harms way to protect them with no question.  Well I betrayed two of them recently.  I was entrusted with some news in confidence and even though I thought I was within the bounds of secrecy to tell someone I trusted what was going on; I really had no authority to do so.  Regardless of my intentions I was wrong.  When confronted with a question about did I say anything I took the cowards route and lied to cover my own butt for fear of what they might say against me.  See as a believer and a "supposed" follower of Christ you don't really have the option to just do whatever your flesh wants.  You lose too much, the cost is just too great.

I went home and tried to pray and repent, but just like the scripture says, before I can go to God I must go and right the wrong I had done.  Honestly this is one of those times I wish I didn't really love the Lord and really didn't want to follow his example and his word.  Because it is much easier to be a hypocrite than upfront and honest.  It is a lot easier to take something to the grave and live in your own self-righteousness than live upright and holy.  Before even giving it another thought longer I told the people what I had done.  I fought every urge in me to try and justify my actions, because the fact of the matter is, it doesn't matter why I did what I did; I lied and I betrayed a friend.

When you allow the flesh to be your guide and not the Holy Spirit you risk loosing much in your walk.  I spent the whole day crying out to the Lord "why did I lie?"  "Why did I do something as stupid as that?"  "Why did you let me do that?" (yea I went there).  I had never lied to them before and I usually the first to admit I was wrong, but none of that matters because I betrayed people whom I say I loved and cherished with the love of Christ.  You don't just get over that right away.  Now don't get me wrong I know I have to push on and leave it in God's hands to make things right again if it's his will to do so, but it still hurts me that I willingly hurt them.

When the going gets tough I allowed my flesh to take control.  The flesh went into instant protect mode and defended itself rather than the gospel.  Read Galatians 5:13-26 and let it seep into your being, because it tells you the cost of sin is too great.  I am not even talking about hell but I am talking all you lose because you wanted to say your own butt.  What good is wisdom in the bible if you don't adhere to it?  Everyone makes mistakes, but you, and I for that matter, need to remember that the cost is too great.  Yes by grace we are forgiven, but if we are not following his commandments, especially love thy neighbor then why even say we love Christ?  Why say we are willing to take up our cross and follow Jesus if we are not willing to truly deny self?

I can't take back what I said or done all I can do is never repeat it and hopefully help someone else not make the same mistake.  Whenever you feel like you are up against a temptation please try and remember the cost is too great.  We are charged to walk in the Spirit and not the flesh, because their are gonna be times where you won't have time to think and depending on who is leading your life, flesh or the Holy Spirit, that will determine your response to sin and temptation.  Being a Christian is not easy, but I rather push than be a hypocrite.  I hope you truly take something away from this that will refocus your heart and your true desires.  No one not even the bible says it will be easy, but we must push and trust in the Lord the entire way not just when it suits us to.  So I say to you as well fellow reader....I am sorry -Be blessed and a blessing