Who are you trying to serve really?

You know sometimes I wonder why the Lord didn't allow me to change sooner rather than later.  The reason why I say that is because it can be increasingly hard to prove your faith and desire and your understanding of God's word to people who have be "serving" longer or who have been "saved" longer than you.  It can be a little disheartening because you feel like you are constantly having to prove your devotion to seek their approval.  I have a good friend of mine by the name of Lisa and her favorite scripture, which comes to mind for this, is Galatians 1:10 - For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man?  If I were still trying to please man, (than) I would not be a servant of Christ.

Those are some pretty harsh words to the people and to yourself.  Think about it for a second; if you are doing exactly what I just said I was doing, then basically you are not a servant of Christ.  That's a harsh reality to accept about yourself.  But the word of God is absolute and when Paul says that, he is not saying it to bash you but to have you realign your loyalties.  This is more about your own personal walk and devotion than stating your claim to others.

This passage hits home for me, because I spent my whole life trying to appease others and their view of me.  And guess what happened when I didn't receive the recognition I thought I deserved; I lashed out.  I became angry and mean and distant to others.  I am a preachers kid (PK); my dad is a preacher and a respected one and has been one for the better part of my life.  Now mind you I knew the Lord called me at 17 to preach his word, but because of the fear of acceptance and ridicule I chose not to do so and ran until I was 31 years of age.  Not to mention my dad can cast a pretty big shadow in that department.  I felt if I can't live up to my dad's standards as a preacher than I don't deserve to be one.  And that my friends is the exact point...

This is why I had come to realize that the Lord didn't allow me to do what he called me to do yet because I was not at the point where I was ready to serve him and him alone.  I was too busy serving my own selfish ambition and seeking the approval of man (dad or the church).  There's nothing wrong with wanting those close to you to cosign your work, but you should not be doing it for them.  It should always be done to the glory of God and for God alone.  There's a saying we say in church when it comes to the naysayers and the backbiters that always got something to say against you or what you are trying to do for the Lord and that is "Not one single person has a heaven or hell to put you in".  That saying is a constant reminder of Galatians 1:10; God alone is the only one that has my final resting place in his hands.  Nothing anyone on this earth says, does, or judges will change that fact.

It doesn't mean that I don't try and respect my neighbors opinions or even constructive criticism for my growth, but it does mean that I keep the kingdom and serving Christ in the forefront of my mind and actions. Now I am not going to lie to you I still battle with this one often enough but also a lot less often than I used to.  We are human and we want tangible recognition for our good deeds and their is nothing wrong with that, but be care that doing so does not become your god.  Yep there is a fine line between wanting to do good for the kingdom and then doing good for the kingdom so you can be seen.  Scripture says that "Lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and the pride of life are of the world and not of the Father (1 John 2:16).  These three things lead to various sins and pitfalls.  Be very careful where your loyalties lie or else you are know better than those that ridicule and judge your faith based off of their own interpretation. - Be blessed and a blessing